I have not written anything for a long time, because - truth be told, I have not done anything altogether interesting (for all that time) (…and then some).

I moved back to the concrete piles that stretch unbroken from Tokyo, and far further off.
It was a good decision, being that: I don’t fall asleep on my feet from boredom at my old job anymore.

Nowadays I listen to housewives tell me what they think of whatever new movies happen to be new while they’re telling me about them.
I sleep a bit later, “work” an hour, take my 2 hour lunch, “work” one more hour, then go home.

I thought I could paint a lot more with all my extra time here, but all the colors  to be seen here are advertisements for things I don’t want.
I tried rebuilding my website several times, but all the software I’ve tried only seems to allow you to make an extremely ugly website. I sit down every once in a while to try it again, but it gets me nowhere when I could be spending time with the kitten that used to sharpen its claws on my bike tires.  It stopped sharpening its claws on my bike tires right around when it /the kitten disappeared,  a few months ago.

(I would rather go off looking for the kitten than sit for hours trying to get all the electric: headings, fonts, and menus to work, or to match).

I took my girlfriend to America for 2 weeks in October to try American vegetarian food, see my backyard, and see my sister’s wedding. We went to the Statue of Liberty. She had pie for breakfast. Our suitcases were much heavier on the way back.

She took me to a park one day in the fall to see some colored leaves. It was very nice, but a crowded park, an hour away, is not the forest in my backyard.
Now there are only a few apartment buildings - blocking my view of hundreds of other apartment buildings - in my backyard.

Mind you I get full pay to read short dialogues and hand out stickers after the kid’s bingo classes.

There was a day when I got up an extra hour early, so I could get to work earlier, and try to organize something a little more fun and effective for that day’s pair of kid’s classes.
But there was another train jumping suicide which left only enough taxis for the first 50 people, + I wound up with the day off.

I was also off on Christmas day this past year. I sorta’ hoped it would cost less than $2,000 to go back home for Christmas, …but George Bush is only trying to make the world a better safer place (for oil and munitions companies)/ Bush wants everything safe-icated for American Economicalisim.
Everyone else I know was working on Christmas; My girlfriend was working, and sick, so she came out to dinner and went straight back home afterwards.

We went to a Chinese restaurant a few cities down with my old Japanese teacher and her husband . We were a bit late to meet them because there was another train jumping suicide a little while earlier, and the trains didn’t really work for the next hour or so. Aside from us being late, and her being sick, it was good. She had called a week or 2 beforehand to make the reservation + have them prepare an entirely vegan course for the 4 of us.

A few days earlier, the lady who organizes the free Japanese lessons took me to a Christmas party in Tokyo. She brings me to swank restaurants/ takes my girlfriend and I on day trips pretty frequently, and it’s usually moderately interesting, so I rarely ask very many questions about whatever she has in mind. There’s nothing better to do around here anyway.
This was me, her, and around 20 old Japanese couples (men wearing ruffled scarves/ women with clip on pearl earrings) - all sitting stiffly crooning poor translations of English Christmas songs (the translations didn’t fit with the beat or melody whatsoever). The dinner they had inbetween was decidedly NOT vegan. I had: garnishes, bread without butter, and wine whenever a bottle was passed into my corner.
The part of that that I did like was that one old fellow volunteered to do a magic show for everyone, in which he stopped to think and to restart most of the tricks more than once.
I came with a package of cookies someone else had given me earlier that week, and left with a package of wrapped dried seaweed and some Mango jam. Mrs. Ito came with a $500 handmade scarf from Indonesia, and she didn’t want the mango jam she wound up with, so she gave it to me.

I’ve been taking Japanese lessons again since I came back to the city, but now my girlfriend is the one who teaches me, and I don’t ever learn anything. She tries to convince me that the obscene amount of junk mail I get is a valuable thing. I in turn try to estimate the annual per capita tree casualties, but this does nothing to advance my Japanese ability.

Once she tried to argue that hiking is more fun in the city, because you can stop and go shopping whenever you want to. There aren’t any stores in the forest she wisely assertained.
(I know that’s spelled wrong, but I think the A-S-S form is more apt.)

When I 1st moved away from this city - I lived in a small town - surrounded by small mountains. It was a very nice change of scenery, …although very lonely. I wouldn’t want to go back ther for more than a week or so unless somebody came to visit me.
I took lots of baths + tried to develop psychic powers, with some small degree of success.

You’re far more likely to fall asleep while meditating than anything else… but other times, when you’re trying to fall asleep you start vibrating or watching an ultra high speed slide show of God knows what. One night, not so long ago I tried staring into the dark and it felt like I was punched in the head.
I can type that, …and you can read it, …but it’s not something you can read and understand.

There was an end of the year party for all the teachers. It was held in the banquet hall of some hotel. I had a runny nose/ bit of a cold left over from a few days before Christmas, so when I got there, I hung up my jacket and ducked into the bathroom to get some tissues. When I came out, I saw some other teacher nervously running down the hall into the shower room. I asked him if he was going to take a shower, and he said: ‘No, he was looking for me’. When I asked why he was looking for me, he said that the lady that I gave my jacket to said ‘that it was “heavy”, and that she was worried’.

What a F&$#ing mystery that is…. !!!!!!

The teacher that I like, the one who tries to kill me with booze, the one who only speaks at parties, and only then about how much more we (I) could be drinking,… He had some sort of “problem” that required surgery/ He didn’t come to that party.

When wondering what was/ is wrong with my absent friend, I have to admit to the possibility that he might’ve had a heavy jacket (or perhaps an especially long scarf…) &%$%!!

I like that guy, but it was nice to be able to remember more than just the 1st 2 hours of a school party, …for a change.

This was a nice party, as parties should be, but not especially eventful.

On the next night:

One of my old Japanese teachers invited me to join her and a young girl (she knows I’m fond of), to have dinner and some drinks at a bar on the top of a building in a richer part of Tokyo.

I don’t really like Tokyo, but I like my old Japanese teacher, and I like young girls - young girls that I don’t have to go all the way to Tokyo to meet in particular.

This girl I met at this same old Japanese teacher’s Christmas party the year before. I invited her to my party the next day and someone else’s New Year’s party after that, and she came, and she moved to Australia a few days after that.

This place in Tokyo was really nice because: it was classy, I was not allowed to pay for any of it, I got to sit next to a young girl that I’m fond of, and when they told the Maitre’ d (= Head Waiter guy - I can’t spell that) …when they told him I was a vegetarian: he didn’t look at all worried (that always!! happens…), and he didn’t suggest they bring me a nice salad with beef cubes (…which has also happened).

There was a little creek running through the place, and a jazz quintet (with only 3 members - because I can‘t think of the right word for that just now, …but triplet seems …wrong), and they put fresh orchids in all the girly cocktails - so by the end of the night I had a pocket full of orchids. Hooray!

No one believed/ cared that you can eat orchids.

This nice former Japanese teacher of mine had arranged for me to stay at the home of a friend of her’s, on this occasion, and indeed whenever I went back to visit my old city. Her friend just happens to be the mother of the young girl, of which I am fond, who I met last year, who went to live in Australia, who came back to Japan for a few months, who was sitting beside me this night.

I laid awake in the futon in the spare room that they laid out for me, for a long long time wondering if/ + hoping that girl might stop in to wish me a good evening (in a French Maid’s outfit or something).
Perhaps it was at the cleaners.

On the next night:

I met my friend from England, his wife, and baby at a little restaurant. He and I started getting “warmed up/ drunk” for their party that evening at 5. Everyone else showed up at 8:30. My very previous ex-girlfriend also came. I asked how she’d been getting along and she said she had a wrinkle.

That’s where 2 years goes I suppose; She didn’t offer any other details except to announce loudly that I was getting a bald spot like a dirty old man she knows. I reminded her that I have larger boobs than her (and I don’t have any boobs at all - just to point a fact).

Other than that, and the fact that everyone went home at 11:15, it was a fairly nice party.

On my way back to that girl’s house that I was staying at, I stopped at the bar where I had my leaving Japan party the previous spring. I had bought a little souviner for the owner, who got to talking to me, and some other guy I’d met once before came in with 3 girls… + I didn’t wind up leaving until 5am.

12 hours is a lot of drinking in my opinion, and I never used to like drinking really.

I walked back to the girl’s house that I was staying at. I used the key that they gave me to get in - but they’d put the chain on the door as well; It’s the last thing you need an hour before dawn in the cold…

I thought about just sleeping on the front step, but then I figured that because I’m from New Jersey - I could work the damn thing loose.

I did eventually.

The practice came in very handy the next night, …when they put the chain on the door again…

I went to a party the next night:

That nice old (and when I say old I really mean it as former- much more than aged) Japanese teacher had thrown a Christmas party for me, which was a bit hit, and a great many people attended, but I was busy that day, so she did another one for me on this night. The girl and her mother whom I was staying with came, as did a few Nepali and Korean acquaintances, and my older drinking Canadian friend. They ordered everything that could be made meat/ fishless to be made, so I didn’t have a lot of time left over for drinking.

But after that party ended, ..and the girl and her mother, and most other people went home, my old Japanese roommate, my Canadian friend and I went out drinking. The staff at the bar smiled an awful awful lot!

After my older drinking Canadian friend wept comically for 20 minutes or so, my old Japanese roommate confessed that he’d given them (the staff) the hottest hot sauce in the world, which I’d brought for him from America some months before. We did “Rocks, Paper, Scissors” to see who could choose which of the cheese ball looking things they would eat. I wasn’t certain that they were all vegetarian, so I cheated and peaked, and it is well that I did so, …or I wouldn’t have a nice long funny video of my friend: talking about how strong he is, crying, …and asking for more ice-cream.

The ice-cream does help.

We had another party the next night . My English friend came along, and he drew the short straw but: I felt badly for him, I heard that hot sauce may cure Diabeties, and he paid me 830 yen to eat the hottest hot sauce in the world in his place.

There is a video of me crying and eating ice-cream as well, but I don’t think it is as funny…
It is true about my bald spot though…

We went to karaoke after. That night was the 31st, and we stayed up until 6:30ish. My old roommate tried to get me with a rolling kick one too many times (3 times), so I kicked part of the couch out of the way and he had a good solid fall to the floor. The year is young yet, but that is still the highlight, …thus far.

I stayed with my older drinking Canadian friend, because the girl whom I had been staying with was going to go to Korea with her mother early on the 1st. I was planning to take a train back to Nagano the day before the 1st, to make it in time for my favorite dance club’s closing forever party. I was told that that party went from 8pm to12 noon the next day. I was woken up just after noon by some boisterous drinking Canadians telephoning my friend via his computer/ web cam.

4 of the 6 of us from the night before drove to Nagano that evening. We got lost along the way, and everyone was later shocked at how cold my apartment is.

They have no gourmet vegetarian food at rest stops in Japan, but they have the cutest hello kitties in the gift shops.

I’m not really sure how I spent all the rest of my time off from work. I tried riding my bike to some of those famous sightseeing spots near my town, but I just wound up on an isolated road at the top of some far off mountain, at dusk, before I had to turn back. I mostly finished a painting I had all but given up on a little less than a year before: “the Other side” - coming soon! - though maybe not quite so so soon.

I cooked a nice soup.

I was invited to a party, than dis-invited mere minutes after accepting.

I was invited snowboarding (by the same girl), and heard no details whatsoever regarding the plans, so I excused myself from that excursion, and went with my newer drinking Canadian friend and his friends instead.

My neck and back still hurt.

My feet feel better.

For a time I thought I might turn into one of those human snowballs that keeps rolling down hill - getting bigger and bigger (like in those old cartoons).

The girl, whom I am fond of, whose home I stayed at while I was visiting my old city,

who I have not seen in a French Maid’s outfit,

whose mother kept “absent mindedly?“ putting the chain on the door,….

She wrote to say that Korea was nice, and that she intends to take me up on my offer of a place to stay/ to go snowboarding. This coming weekend. That’s something nice anyway.

I finally asked my landlord to have someone come and look at my sink. (It leaks and leaks persistently, but only when I am trying to sleep (It also leaked all the time I was in my old city.).) The plumber that came couldn’t make it leak (I was not trying to sleep at the time.). He suggested I put a sponge under the faucet when I get tired/ go on vacation.

Christmas in Japan is improving, but still very very weak.
Last year I went to a teeny tiny all vegetarian restaurant in Tokyo with a friend that doesn`t like Christmas, and another friend who doesn`t approve of vegetarian food. Afterwards we stopped at another place where we met my old roommate and his old girlfriend, and the 3 of them ordered/ ate a plate of whale. I had my eyes closed for about an hour.
This year I went to work, …and snuck out about 40 minutes early.
Then I went to City Hall to pay for my health insurance. In the evening there was a party with 10/15 other non-Japanese people, who also had to work that day. Everyone was slightly sullen, and continuously waiting for the 2 (poor) turkies they`d procured to be finished. I only brought 1 block of tofu, which was excellent, but there was only my 1 block of tofu, and several desserts for me to eat. It was of course better than sitting at home alone; My home is very cold.

On Christmas Eve there was a very good party. The only thing wrong with the party, was that I had to leave the Christmas Eve party early – to get up early to go to work on Christmas. I won at “Twister” again, …as I always do!

On Christmas Eve – Eve, I had a party at my house, and people seemed to have a good time at it. My Friend from Cornwall came to Japan to visit his wife`s family for Christmas + New Years. He came to see me that afternoon, + we started drinking later in the afternoon. I also invited the travel agent that always walks through my school, her friend from their travel company, and the 3 drinking friends of my Newer drinking Canadian friend. I invited a lot of other people as well, but those were the ones that came. They were loads of fun!

The day before that, I had a date with a girl who canceled at the last minute, because she`d gotten a boyfriend. I went to that little bar near my house to drink with the loud/ but congenial old lady that waits for me there. (It`s better than sitting at home alone, …and cold). The nice guy that works there gave me a little dish of noodles for free. They were meatless, but I don`t think they were entirely vegetarian `cause I started to feel sick when I got home, I was sicker on Christmas, and I am still sick now.

I am supposed to go back to my old city tomorrow to see my Cornish friend/ his wife/ and baby. – so it might perhaps be better to NOT be sick. I`m supposed to go to a party of one kind or another for the next 5 nights.

I`ll be staying at the home of a young pretty pharmacist, whose mother didn`t mind the company, while this girl was away in Australia for a year (even though the company was little “me”) – so perhaps it`s better that I am sick, …but probably not.

This girl I met last year, just before New Years day, about a week before she moved to Australia. She came back to Japan 2/ 3 days ago. I don`t know if she knows that I`m invited to come sleep on their floor for a few days. I`m still not sure what to do with myself when my Cornish friend and his family go back, …and the girl that went to Australia goes on to Korea but, I think it will entail some amount of shivering, and probably some dancing.

My father sent me some article about these scientists that had a funny idea about diabetes, …and cured it, (…in mice). They noticed that diabetics happen to have more nerve endings in their pancreases, so for “the scientific fun of it”, they took those diabetic mice and injected them with Capsicum (pepper extract). Those mice woke up the next day – not diabetic – and remained “not diabetic” for past several months. They intend to perform further studies.

Encouraged by this news I have decided to drink a bottle of hot sauce every night, until I run out of hot sauce (probably 2 nights later).

I`ll take this new wonder medicine: “Hot sauce” and rub it in the eyes of the thankful (once) blind. I`ll sprinkle it on burns, cuts, and bruises. I`ll use “Hot sauce” to cure the uncomfortable numb mouth, sweat, and dizziness caused by injesting too much hot sauce.
Will hot sauce heat my house?

I`m not too sure about what sorts of people read these. I`ve said that before, and I am saying it now, again. Chances are, if you`re using the internet you can handle the following, but you may want to take this as your warning:

This is “the Truth” after all….

You see, I had a dream that I was having sex with a fat girl, and she was making fun of me all the while. I remember thinking that it might be fun to flip her over and maybe smack her big soft abusive butt once or twice, but I didn`t seem to think it would work. She didn`t like the way I talk or something… I might have told her that she could stand to be a lot friendlier/ and a lot fitter, but you never think of things like that when you`re dreaming; I thought of it when I woke up though, and was ever so slightly perturbed.
I tried to go back to sleep to see if she had a better looking friend or sister roaming around in my head, but I was too awake at that point. - Peculiar.

So I lay in bed mourning the arrival of another morning – as is my custom, and eventually got up to go out painting again.
The day before was beautiful – a great day to go out painting, but I had to help set up for the City`s Annual International Party then. I especially had to be there, because I was scheduled to stand on stage alone and sing.
That I`ve done several times before, and the results are typically less than entirely good.
I`ve either gotten better in the last few years, or everyone in Japan is very polite, perhaps it is both. I actually had a very nice time there. I met a lot of good looking young ladies that I will certainly never hear from again. Oh, I`ve been waiting!
This is what I wrote to my Manager this morning:
“Thank-You! At this school, I can check my e-mail and print things - neither with any sort of hassle. Can`t say I`m too pleased about working on Christmas - I guess that means I`ll be stuck in the area - not that there was anything particularly special going on in Saitama on the 25th. No classes at all today, so I`m grading papers/ updating my webpage/ wondering why none of the semi-sexy ladies from the international party haven`t written to ask if they can come by for an erotic massage.
The lady that works in my building - whom I have to make water payments to, said to ask my “Oyasan” if I have an external water pipe heater installed or not. I thought she was the “Oyasan”. “Name withheld” said she would come by to look sometime but: I haven`t heard from her since our drunken Jenga game after the international party, and I doubt she knows anything about external water pipe heaters besides. She`s still more than welcome to come, as I`ve decided to open a “LADIES ONLY Erotic Massage Parlor” - and I may need some practice. - I may need the practice, but I`d absolutely make that up for that with Enthusiasim - I can assure you.”

This is what I wrote to my sister last month:
“ I don`t really want anything. Maybe some nice Oatmeal. If I`d have known 10 years ago that I was looking forwards to getting oatmeal for Christmas I would have cried.”.

This is what I wrote to myself last month:
“Don`t forget to write back to Mr. Fuji”

….but it`s not like I have to take orders from myself is it?!! (I forgot + just remembered today)

This is what I wrote to a friend of mine 3 years ago:
“I meant to write - to you, and other people, but I always forget whenever I’m actually near a computer. How was Christmas/ New-Years?
I came back to the US for about 2 weeks. My girlfriend bought a ticket to New York, so I had to go too, then after I got the extra day and a half off of work, paid for the ticket, and told everyone I was coming back, she canceled (’cause she needed the money to move out of her house? - no details available, I think she just changed her mind. I’m gonna look for a new girlfriend, but I always introduce all the girls I know to all the other girls I know, and they all talk to each other – collude to not go out with me.) I figure my grandparents are getting old and I should try to see them at least once a year anyway”.

I got rid of that old one about a half a year after writing that, but I still haven`t gotten a new girlfriend…
My Grandmother died last month, …some changes are easier to rely on – it would seem.

Last week I had a date with this girl that I had a date with maybe a month and a half before that. I had a great time both times, but she never writes back, except on the rare occasion to say that she`s too busy.
I still like her better than that girl that used to ask me to go out dancing with her and never showed; And I like her far far better than the fat girl that haunts my sleep.

I asked this other girl I didn`t/ don`t really like, if she`d like to come by for dinner one night, and she said okay, and later asked if she could bring her 3 friends along. I figured I may as well throw a party if that was what was going to happen anyway, so I invited the girl I had had the one date with and hadn`t heard back from in over a month. She wrote back to say that she was too busy then though.
The girl I don`t really like brought along some other girl, who I did like better, but didn`t have the chance to speak to then or ever afterwards.

It feels like I`m damn Rodney Dangerfield – if you remember him.

I had a dream that small groups of Aliens, Angels, and Spirit Demons were watching me to see how I would react when they revealed that despite all my efforts, I`ve been doing something confoundedly wrong for the past few years. What else can you do but change and hope it`s not a trick of some sort.

I met an angel kind of a thing once, but it just wanted me to stop what I was doing and go back inside of my body.
You never think to ask Angel seeming kinds of things about Rodney Dangerfield or any of that when you find yourself suddenly loose/ in spirit form.